Vicarious Trauma and Nervous System Fatigue

Vicarious Trauma and Nervous System Fatigue in Women Who Hold Space for Others

Many women working in wellness, caregiving, or helping professions carry a quiet kind of exhaustion.

It is not always obvious burnout.
It is not always crisis.

Sometimes it is something more subtle.

Vicarious trauma.

Vicarious trauma occurs when we are repeatedly exposed to the emotional pain, stress, or trauma of others. Even when we are strong, trained, and compassionate, our nervous systems are still impacted.

This is especially true for women who:

• Work in wellness or healing professions
• Hold emotional space for clients
• Care for children or aging parents
• Lead teams or communities
• Are the steady one in every room

Over time, the body absorbs more than we consciously realize.

You may notice:

• Emotional fatigue
• Increased irritability or numbness
• Trouble sleeping
• Feeling wired but exhausted
• A subtle loss of joy
• Compassion fatigue

Vicarious trauma is not weakness. It is physiology.

When we consistently attune to others, our nervous systems activate in response to their stress. Without regular regulation and restoration, this activation accumulates.

The body does not distinguish between “my stress” and “stress I am witnessing.”

It simply responds.

For women in wellness, this can create a painful paradox:
You are skilled at helping others regulate — but you have little space to regulate yourself.

Healing must include the helper.

Nervous system restoration is not indulgent. It is necessary.

This is one reason healing with horses can feel profoundly supportive for women in helping professions.

In the quiet presence of the herd, there is no story to carry. No client to fix. No emotional processing to hold.

Horses respond to what is real in the moment. They offer co-regulation without expectation.

On the land, away from constant input, your nervous system can shift out of hyper-attunement and into steadiness.

The body softens. The breath deepens. The vigilance eases.

For women who spend their lives caring for others, this kind of regulated presence can feel like relief.

Vicarious trauma is not a failure of resilience.

It is a reminder that even the strongest nervous systems need tending.

And you are allowed to receive the care you offer so generously to others.